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Showing posts with label sex. Show all posts
Showing posts with label sex. Show all posts

Wednesday, February 16, 2011

The Temple of Liberation

We get pissed, we get excited; we get contented and we get poignant but we Indians know how to give words and voices to our moods. We express the fair, but conceal the dark in any of the four chambers of our hearts or any gray cell in our cerebrums. But we divulge them when time comes and we travel sleeper class and we use their toilets and their walls.


I remember one of the walls shouting at the-then-hot-political-agenda in Maharashtra. Biharis shouting at Marathis and calling them goons and the latter calling the formers outsiders and job-snatchers; a classic tussle scribbled in grimy handwriting. There was a rough caricature of a renowned firebrand politician with a frog like face, hidden behind rimless spectacles and well-gelled hairs combed neatly. There were poetries and shayaris and randomness. Any politician pouring his liquid gold down the drain could have sensed the unrest but they travel first class and use their toilets but not their walls. Their wall is called the Parliament.

We are a sex starved nation. Though Vatsyayan wrote the 1250 verses of Kamasutra in the 2nd century CE for Indians to learn and memorize, But we have continued to enlighten the west and we have continued being the land of snake charmers and Sadhus and Software Engineers and Call centre executives. So Sex is perhaps the least discussed but the most thought over topic in India. We keep concealing it till we find the wall of liberation. So they draw, they write and they croon about their wildest sexual fantasies. The outer guise of a gentleman or rather a pretentious godly creature is flushed down by rusty manual pipe of the lavatory and the gentle, inventive Satan clouds the white walls.

Relationships and breakups are all immortalized in this temple. Love stricken hearts praising their lady loves, one sided lovers writing their undeliverable love letters to the damsels, broken hearts shouting at their once-a-goddess-now-a-whores; Some even making their mobile numbers public, their way of taking revenge banking on the fact that once a urinating deity will read it and impart justice. Fair? Unfair? Their and theirs to decide?

Unpleasant letters to parents, frustration about receding hairline and bulging paunches, complaints about existence and every dark emotion which is not conceivable under the sun finds its mention inside the temple of liberation and its sacred walls which is better selling than the best bestsellers bringing a smile, a frown or any emotion every time a reader reads it.

India is a land of Public speakers and private thinkers. We shout, we fight, we forget. We smile on their faces, we crib at their backs and we love to hold grudges. We are a shining metal pot, but our water tastes of rust, the inners are not that well polished. And when we come to ourselves with no human scent around, we feel liberated. And we shout and cry our worries out. That’s our way of lightening ourselves. A marker and a washroom wall is what we need, the most disgusting civic practice but we love it.

Sunday, June 20, 2010

...And we say it's a man's world


It’s so difficult to write about a specie which has over 10000 poems, a million songs and so many broken hearts to its credit. The Internet Search Engine giant Google has made billions because of this specie. Add “Hot”, “Sexy”, “Sensuous”, “Cute”, “Beautiful” and all look good-feel good adjectives to this specie’s name and you get so many results. No prizes for guessing that I am talking about the fairer sex, the Ladies who claim being at the back of every successful man. I am still not sure if “being at the back” act comes first or “a man turning successful”, though If I go by my whims, I support the latter.
Men, by nature of their behavior, style, dressing, talking and eating are simple and if not simple they are pretty effortless. Women have different moods for different occasions. Women persona ranges from a Kid, to a Nanny, to a School principal, to a grandmother and sometimes as weird as a circus ringmaster. And defining on grounds of dressing habit, Girls are complex again. While our sneakers fit in a party, a pub, a discothèque, a long drive and sometimes even with office formals, women bless the occasions with stiletto, High Heel Pump, Low Heel Pump, Ankle boot and Suede Mules respectively(I googled for it)
While Men have a broad classification for food, Vegetarian and Non Vegetarian, and for us breakfast would be a little chicken and meal would be lots of it, Women again have lots of tongue twisters for their food as well. Overcooked, Undercooked, Deep fried, Shallow Fried, Low on Fat, High on Carbs, Mathematics is a good thing to know but why associate food with it? Anyways, to each his own. We prefer drinking at home, why spend five times the actual cost, at those stylish pubs and restro-bars, women love drinking at these high end places and often(always) the smiling man on the other side of the table bears the brunt of it. Smiling, yeah right!
When four men congregate, they talk about sports, when four women assemble, they talk about Apparels and accessories. Men accept compliments very gracefully, Women don’t e.g. – Hey Mr. X you look great today! “Thank you so much mate”. Hey Miss Y you look great today! “What do you mean TODAY?” While men like to read the newspaper in the order of importance, Headlines – Current Affairs – Sports and so on, Women almost always are satisfied with the four page fashion and Trends supplement. Men have a big wardrobe, stuffed with a few clothes but they somehow fit every occasion. Women have big wardrobes, neatly filled with clothes, which when transferred to an Air-conditioned store might constitute a full fledged apparel store, but “I have nothing to wear” is the most common feminine complaint. A man repeats his shirt after every four day, a woman repeats her Top after every four months. Talking about choices Men like beautiful (Just beautiful) women, Women on the other hand like chivalrous, caring, successful, rich, confident, funny, courageous, well mannered good looking men. Well in independent packages we fit the bill but talking in collective terms, this is literally impossible and “Impossible”, for a change this time does not say “I-m-possible”.
But in spite of all these not-so-good traits, the magnetic effect of the fairer sex is unexplainable. Men do cry about the bads that the his love interest might have done to him , but there is no denying that he would still get up and jump headfirst at the next beautiful lady in line. Female gender is a beautiful artwork of the almighty and they make this world a confusing, yet a beautiful place to live. And as the famous quote says “Sure God created man before woman, but then again you always make a rough draft before creating the final masterpiece